digibutter.nerr

[Almaz]

HELLO LOSERS! Welcome to the greatest shows in Role-Play, featured here in the magnificent WARIO STADIUM! Yes, this beautiful arena of death and sport is the Great Wario's ultimate show of success...I mean, besides the video games, castles, towns, giant gold statues, birdhouses, science centers, little midget guys with Wario jackets, planets with Wario's face on them...you get the idea. Just another show that the GREAT WARIO is the star of digibutter.nerr. AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT, MORONS!

Anyway, I was looking through my huge list of fans on what would get the Great Wario the most money. So, Wario is starting up his old fan favorite for old times sake, and a totally new thing as well!

The Great Wario is starting deathmatches! What are those? BATTLES TO THE DEATH...or to unconsciousness, evaporation, ring-outs, or forfeiting. Anyway, here's the lowdown on those things. I throw four losers into a huge boxing ring, one comes out on top. Then the "winner" (and by winner, I mean loser) will fight one opponent of the Great Wario's choice. If Wario's Choice wins, then I'll choose another foe for my choice to fight against. However, if a winner wins twice, he'll go on to the final round. Once we get four morons in the final round, they fight until a champion comes out. Then the champion will LOSE to the Great Wario, and Wario will be declared God! Oh, and the loser will get their picture in a hall of fame or something...I dunno...

Oh, and I'll also start up that decathalon thing when I figure out how to run both at the same time...the math's dang confusing!

Anyway, here are the four losers that will fight. Maybe if you cheer them on, they might have better odds of winning...maybe!


Mr. L
Oh sure, you can put any moron in tights and a mask, and he'll look good. Chump.
VS

Ganondorf Dragmire
Apparently, you can also put a moron in EVERY SINGLE FREAKIN' GAME and he'll somehow look cool, too. Wimp.
VS

Goonie
...you have to be *crag*ing me...fried seagull in ten seconds.
VS

Koopa Bros.
...yeah...apparently you can put any dorks as a spoof, and they'll be popular as Underwhere. Freaks.

So yeah, CHEER ON YOUR FAVORITE! BUY LOTSA CONCESSIONS! BEAT UP THE GUY IN THE SEAT NEXT TO YOU! WARIO STADIUM IS THE #1 TOPIC EVER CREATED FOR THIS FREAKIN' SITE!

[Megamaw]

"Go Goonie!" =D

[Die4Less]

Go Mr. L! Go Mr. L! :awesome:

[Aran Ryan]

Kamek was watching this on TV in his room in Dark Land Castle. He can just simply teleport to Wario Stadium if he felt like watching the whole thing in person.

"Even though I'm not betting anything... I have thoughts that the seagull is gonna win." He thought to himself.

[Almaz]

BATTLE TIME, MORONS!

Alright, I'm the greatest guy in the world, and the referee. So here's the rules: no ring-outs, no miricles, no invincibility to everything except the Master Sword, no rules. Everyone get it?

Caw?

SHUT UP YOU! Idiot! Announce and stuff!

I have a name, moron!

Punching bag?

Oh for the love of...alright, the greatest, Waluigi, will announce! In the...er...do we have corners? Whatever, in the first corner, we have the green thunder, the masked marauder, the idiot in tights, MISSSSTTTTEEEER L!

I'll have to catch all my fangirls L-ater, because this is for you, ladies!

Creepy...but, in the second corner, we have the king of evil, the cel-shaded fatty, the master of darkness, GANONDORF DRAGMIRE!

Hmph...this is just a quick demonstration for all of those who get in my way...

In the third corner, it's a...segull who's probably going to win, the underbird, GOONIE!

Caw

I'm likin' this guy...keeps his mouth shut!

And in that stupid corner, it's the idiot brothers!

HEY! RESPECT!

You said it, Red!

YEAH! GAH! MY TEXT COLOR BURNS MY EYES!

It's okay, man, just don't talk that much...we'll get through this, dude.

A-a...alrighOHMYGODTHEPAIN!

And I'm the handsome one!

I see a quick fight and then Goonie will konck Ganondorf on the head with a rock or something and win it...boring...

FIGHT!

Caw!

And Goonie has taken to the skies! This is a predictable opening!

Huddle up guys!

Pssh! Can't let you do that, losers! Fireball!

YEOWCH!

OH THAT STINGS!

MY BODY...MY EYES!

...I don't get it

And the Koopa Bros have taken some damage, except for Green who dodged it.

Hmph. Watch your hide, mortal.

EEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG!!!!

And Ganondorf has burnt Mr. L with an energy ball!

Hey...that hurt!

Oh, you're still up? Hmph. Darkness come forth and vanquish my foe!

What the?!

Wow...Ganondorf just summoned a bunch of dark hands out of nowhere, and they're flinging fire at Mr. L. Is that legal?

It's funny, so, yeah.

Alright dudes, we gotta figure out how to stop these incredibly powerful...

Caw!

Ow! That hurt slightly!

And Goonie dropped a pebble on Red's head, which barely did anything!

Okay dudes, for real now, we gotta use the power of teamwork to...

Caw!

GAH! WILL YOU STOP THAT?!

Caw.

YEAH, WELL...YOUR MOM!

Caw

OW! THAT WAS MY EYE! I'M HIT! OW!

And Red was hit in the eye with a pebble, but is just yelling at Goonie...alright, this is getting nowhere, let's go back to the real battle.

Heh...you're pretty good...

Foolish human...now DIE!

I don't think so...NEGATIVE DISCHARGE!

What th--

ZAP!

...alright, it appeared that Mr. L shot some sort of inverted lightning out of his hand. It destroyed all of Ganondorf's minions, and hurt Ganondorf a bit.

Hm...unexpected. No matter, DARKNESS--

Caw!

ARG! Foolish bird...FACE MY WRATH!

CAW! Caw...Caw...

Ganondorf snapped his fingers and set Goonie on fire, and Goonie seems to be tiring. Wow...that was pretty pathetic.

Good chance to heal...SHROOM SHAKE!

And Mr. L pulled out a Shroom Shake and healed himself!

Alright dudes, focus all of your attention and bombs on that bird!

But, Red, shouldn't we...

TAKE DOWN THAT DAMN BIRD!

Alright, dude.

Nacho power!

What the...no, Green, NO!

And...uh...the Koopa Bros were going to throw Ninja Bombs at Goonie, but Green screwed them up and now they dropped them all on the ground.

Guys...don't...move...

But...that intimidating James Earl Jones-like guy is coming right toward us. And he'll kill us!

If we move, we're toast.

...GREEN, YOU IDIOT! GAH! MY TEXT COLOR BURNS!

I thought there'd be nachoes...

[color=darkred]Hmph. I'll put you fools out of your misery. WARLOCK--

THUNDER JUMP PUNCH!

GRAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Oooh...painful. Ganondorf was about to finish off the Koopa Bros, but he was hit by Mr. L, who...

Caw!

GAH! GOONIE PECKED ME IN THE EYE! IS THAT ALLOWED?!

It is now.

I hate you...

That's my job.

Alright, who has something we can actually use?

I got...uhhh...some sort of metal thing.

I got...uhhhh...a hot dog.

I got ninja stars!

THROW THE DANG SHURIKEN, GREEN!

Okay!

GAH!

NOT AT YELLOW!

Sorry...

You...miserable little...GAH!

Ooohhh...and Ganondorf was hit in the back with some shuriken! That's GOT to be painful...

You fools...I...will...be...THE END OF YOU! MANIFEST, DARKNESS! SHOW THEM THE MEANING OF FEAR!!!!

Ooooohhhh...why am I quaking.

R-r-red...I suddenly feel l-l-less r-r-radical.

S-s-sh-...shut up, B-b-black.

Hmph...DESTRO-

Caw!

OW! Wait...no...NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

KA-BLANG! FALCOOOOOON PAWWWWWNNNNCH!

Wow...I don't even know what just happened...Ganondorf was summoning a huge amount of darkness to finish off all of his opponents...but then Goonie, still on fire, came in and rammed into Ganondorf...then, I guess all the darkness imploded on him, causing a Youtube Poop to appear in a paradox, and therefore destroying both of them...you get any of that?

Huh? Wha happened, I was stealing that yellow guy's hot dog...

Wario!

OH! Uh...the tall, dark guy and the seagull down!

And now it's down to...an identity-confused plumber and a bunch of teenage moron ninja turtles. Boy, this just got uninteresting.

Heh...I'll catch you all L-ater!

Hey! Red, man! The bombs are all gone! We're free!

YAY...MY EYES!

Green...thanks, man, I dunno why, but it's awesome to see we're all here.

Where am I?

...alright, screw Green, let's just finish this guy. You all ready?

Yeah!

...

NACHOES!

Heh...touching speech, but...you aren't anything compared to me and my Metal Bro. BROBOT!

And Mr. L got into his giant robot-thing that's...really ugly.

PREPARE TO EAT LASER, LOSERS!

No, you can go bye-bye.

ACTIVATE THE REMOTE, RED!

ACTIVATING IT!

What the-NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

KA-SHING! BLAM!

Uhhhh...what did the Koopa Bros do, exactly?

Well, when we saw that we were fighting an extremely overpowered guy, a seagull, and a very popular character, we were sure that the overpowered guy would go down quick for comedic effect, predictably. Then we were sure the seagull would beat us, but since the seagull already lost, we set up this backup scenario. We then went to the popular character's trump card and stashed a bunch of C4's in it before the match. Then we waited for him to use it and blew him sky high!

Such cheating! Such dirty tactics! Such...er...explosions! Koopa Bros...

Not...quite...

OH! AND MR. L IS STILL UP!

I don't need...lasers...to destroy you...here...we go...grrrrr...HA!

OH SHOOT!

MR. L JUST PULLED OUT A SMASH BALL! HE JUST PULLED OUT A FREAKIN' SMASH BALL!

Heh...HEAD SMASH!

HE JUST BROKE IT OPEN! NOW HE'S GUNNA USE!

NEGATIVE ZONE!

Negative Zone? WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS, LUIGI?!

Yes...I...remember...I am LUIGI!

...oh, WHO DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING!

...SPAGHETTI!

...oh shit, WARIO, GET THE STADIUM OUTTA HERE! LEAVE THE BOXING RING AND THE IDIOTS, JUST GET US OUTTA HERE!

EJECT!

And Wario activated the hover feature on the boxing ring to make it fly in the air, so that we don't have to face...

HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-!!!!!

NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHH!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

WHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

SPAGHETTI!

I'm Luigi, Number-a one!

...Luigi used his Spaghetti attack...and obliterated the Koopa Bros...

The Koopa Bros are the winners.

WHAT?!

You're disqualified for changing your name in the middle of a match! Also, we have a "no heroes" policy, bub!

BUT THERE AREN'T ANY RULES!

There are now...TAKE HIM AWAY!

Errr...after we revive the Koopa Bros, they'll be fighting again...soon...yeah...uhhh...bye for now!

Caw!

AH! GHOST!

[Tayl]

{{THAT WAS POSSIBLY THE BEST BATTLE EVER IN ROLEPLAYING HISTORY

ESPECIALLY THE PARADOX PART}}

[Megamaw]

He sighed. "You did your best, Goonie!"

[Die4Less]

Rats! Disqualified.

Hooray... Who Won?

[LudwigVonKoopa]

[Aran Ryan]

*He fell off of his bed, laughing, after watching the whole battle*

That... was AWESOME!

[Strong Bad]

Hm, if this 'wrestling' is so popular, I can use it to...TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

Aw, Goonie didn't win. D:

[The Chaos Heart]

Heh...this could be entertaining.

[Almaz]

Uhhh...ALRIGHT! We've apparently rebuilt the arena, and shot down Mario's enclosed instruction book that was going to hit us after this, so now WE'RE BACK!

Now, Donkey Kong was-a gunna come in here and give the Loser Bros a whoopin', but...er...a banana truck fell over on the way here...he's been arrested for..er...murder? No, wait, hit n' run, I guess...whatever that is...

ANYWAY, we don't got no one. So...the first idiot who suggests some chump for the Teenage Moron Narutard Koopas to lose to will get it. It just HAS to be an enemy of...heck, any hero. And I mean designated video game heroes, not people who consider Bowser to be a hero...losers...

GO!

[Aran Ryan]

*If there is a request hotline near Wario, it was ringing*

[Megamaw]

"Give Goonie another chance!"