digibutter.nerr

[Kii]

I agree with the whole topic pretty much. It's not something that would make me hate you at all; in fact, I respect you for being able to come to terms with yourself.

[Zelnor]

Excuse me for being probably the biggest jerk in existence, but why do you think you are a woman in a guys body ? Reincarnation ?

[Count_Bleck]

I'm fine with it with you. I was fine with it with Chaos Dimentio.
I'll be fine with it if Guest says it too.
...I'm changing back to Maya instead of diego now.

[Mantis15]

You don't have to feel bad about this kind of thing.

I don't care if my friends are gay or bi or a woman trapped in a man's body. It's who they are and how they feel about. No one here will think of you as a freak for saying this. It's just people who aren't your friends are the ones you should be worried about, not us. So just relax about it here, we're digibutter and we don't give a damns worth on what sexuality the members are or who are women trapped in men's bodies.

[Super Postman]

[Aggrieved]

...

I see.

Well, I won't judge you any differently than I did before, although I'll switch back to my current user theme, since it seems rude to keep it.

You're still human. That's all that matters.

You'll still be the O'Chunks that we all know and love, and no gender can change that.

[Ensenga]

Well uh, I haven't been here that long, so I had no preset perceptions to begin with. So now I'm going to back out of this thread slowly.

If there's one thing I do know however, its that the pit of useless knowledge that I call my brain tells me that this isn't as uncommon as one might assume. Anyway, backing out slowly now.

[Celeste Dimentia]

Well, I thought I was alone in this for the longest time. It's an unbelievably good feeling to find someone who you can connect with so strongly. Especially amidst the pain that O Chunks mentioned, which is very real... I've felt it; still do.

... I suppose I'd just like my outside to reflect what's inside. If I may attempt to put it simply.

[Zelnor]

If you say that a soul has a set gender and you were born into a body of the opposite one, for whatever reasons - how do oyu know ? What do oyu attribute to your soul, the very core of your being, that is distinctively female ? I don't want to stumble into sexist gender remarks, but in face of the danger - Do you think you're very delicate or emotional ? What is it that makes oyu think you are feminine in mind ? And how does that make you miserable, as I catch from your posts, with whom you are ? The body doesn't shape the mind more then the mind shaped the body. The body may press it into a certain role like a jelly mold the jelly, but... you're still you. Are you female in mind because of what attributes you see in yourself are not commonly associated with males and you can't mentally bridge the gap between what you are and what you feel you should be / what society "expects" of you ?

... Good Lord, I sound like my therapist. Still, I'm being serious here. Maybe we can "help" you. I don't mean to attribute something negative to your "condition", that's why I put it all into quotation marks, and I don't want you to think I want you to interpret the negative meanings of the words, but I simply have no other term.
But maybe we can help you to accept it as it is.

[Legendary Mashine]

[Super Postman]

I'm not doubting something is wrong with me.... maybe I am selfish but I believe every individual has a right to be happy...as who they are.


metaphorically ( sorry for the epic doses of emo here). I am trapped in a barbed cage, I see the outside world, I feel trapped and hurt... If I resist the cage, I get hurt, but if I do not resist the cage, I am unhappy. All things attribute to this. at this point in my life I am not living....

I respect your concern for me Zelnor, Its just.... Ive tried to accept it as it is... and it..... just causes more pain... The path of least resistance isn't always the path of happiness. Edit: By that I mean, its defiantly more convenient for me to be a "normal" Male... but at least putting up the farce that I am one is making me unhappy.

Jolene, That is only a part of it, one of the many factors I Know to attribute to how I am. I happen to take what people say about me to heart, I'm weak around criticisms. That being said, I have hidden my "feminine traits" before...
social expectations do play a role yes, but its not the only reason I am this way. thank you for trying to clarify though.

[Ensenga]

So let me wrap my head around this, and sorry in advance If I'm misconstruing the situation, my reading comprehension is sometimes below average. Err also I ended up not reading through the Dimentio thread because...well I was busy get off my back.

[psuedo intelligent psychological babble] Ok so now, you're saying within yourself you identify feminine traits? And you identify those with pieces of your inner most self, your purest consciousness and not just random slips of the mind? And that this would make you intrinsically a woman trapped in a man's body? [/psuedo intelligent psychological babble]

[Celeste Dimentia]

You know, it's something that's kept me awake, as I try to wrap my mind around it myself...

You know... is Sarah just another part of me that I invented? I have a vivid imagination... but then upon deep introspection, it feels right, it's who I am, and I don't want to be ashamed of it. But then, what constitutes being a female? Have I merely gathered my own collection of accumulated societal norms on what makes one gender or the other? Example, girls are supposed to be sensitive, girls are supposed to do this and that, etc...

Maybe there really is something wrong with me... but no matter how hard I try, I can't change how I feel.

That's... all I can think to say atm. At least for myself, personally.

[Ensenga]

[Celeste Dimentia]

I want to be naturally female. But as it is an impossibility - and it's one more cold fact that pains me - I want to at least acquire some piece on the outside that can reflect how I feel on the inside. Even if I can't be perfect...

For some strange reason... maybe I'm somehow chemically imbalanced, I don't know... I don't like being in this body. You know that silly myth where if you breathe out and send all the seeds on a dandelion away from the stem in one blow, you get a wish granted? I remember doing that in elementary school and whispering, "I wish I was a girl." Just something that I still remember well...

So, why do I use the term female to define how I feel, who I am? Why do I feel uncomfortable physiologically being a male? Again, I cannot give a good answer... and I suppose that's the problem. For me, the feeling is expressed in something more than some select and succinct psych terms.