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Fears and doubts
 
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Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 5:13 pm   Reply with quote

Well, apparently I'm invisable.... So I thought I'd share a bit about my life...
Not like it will be read by anyone anyays. >_>

Let's see here.... Anyone know that my father is Bi-polar? =/ My parents are divorsed, and I barely see him anymore now. He's unemployed and depressed and I went 5 months without seeing him. Yeah that's not very good.... It scares me to think if I become like him. What if I do? What if I have a horrible temper? What if I lose all my jobs and make the decisions of a 9 year old?

It doesn't help that people at my school probably think I'm retarted. Not to say I'm not. =/ I mean, I have Nystagmus, which makes my eyes and head shake uncontorallbly. Kinda weird to explain that. It also messes HORRIBLY with my vison. I have terrible eyesight. I proabbly won't get my Driver's Permit if I DID read the book and take the test, becuase of my eyesight. Furthurmore, I have hypotonia. Making my mussules VERY weak. I can't do much stuff... And my speach sucks.... So with all this, I probably look like a Special Education Stutudent or some moron. -_-;

I have no friends at school, and hate evreryone now. I doubt things will get better in college. All my few crushes ended horribly, so now I'm afriad of rejection and stuff.... ANd I'm convinced I'll never find any girl that will love me.

I get good grades, but no clue what do do when I grow up. I'm basically one huge social failure. -_-

And taht's basically it for now. If it has a bunch of spelling mistakes, oh well. Not like anyone will read this.
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Hellza Ballza
Goron Mask
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Joined: 14 Jul 2007
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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 5:28 pm   Reply with quote

I don't really know how to respond to all that and your probably sick of people giving you advice on how to make you feel better but I'll just give it to you anyways...Fine something that makes you happy in life, and LIVE OFF OF IT LIKE A DRUG. Yeah sounds a bit bizarre but thats all I can recommend.
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Some store that sells shit    
Poison
Super Postman
Jailed Vampire
Jailed


Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Posts: 6363

HP: 100 MP: 10 Lives: 11



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 5:36 pm   Reply with quote

wow.. I can relate a bit, my father is also bi-polar. I hope things with him work out.

you shouldn't fear anything. I mean not to say I don't feel fear, but all the same, Fear prevents action. and you should never stand still. some problems can be fixed. others can be dealt with by compromise. but it takes action, never forget that.

to quote Starfox "Don't hesitate, when the time comes, just act." ~Wolf

As for finding someone. don't worry about it too much, you have your whole life ahead of you. I'm sure you will find a great girl. as you are a great person, whose circumstances aren't the greatest right now. its just you have to keep living on the promise of a better tomorrow.
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Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 5:47 pm   Reply with quote

@Goron Mask: The computer. But my mom says I'm adicted and tries to draw me away from it. I have to fake a social life with people that I don't really like. =/

@O'Chucks: Not much things I can do now. I'm alwasy alone at school. I'm like the kid that people are friendly too, but make fun of him behind his back. Only I know theya re doing it. =/

And I really don't think I WILL find someone. Sure, I get complemented all the time "Oh, you are so nice!" "You really know how to treat a women. =P" "PIMP!" ...Last one is on the internet mostly. >_>

But the thing is, no one will WANT to go out with me. I'm ugly and nerdy.... And my personality is more like that of a little brother than a potential boyfriend. I never had my first kiss, even. =/

Heck, it seems only GUYS will love me (Ruki. -_-). But I'm not nor will I ever be gay....
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Dark Prognosticus` Deed Shop    
Poison
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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:05 pm   Reply with quote

I believe there is always something that can be done. Its true people can be royal jerks. but learning skills to deal with these jerks can actually be beneficial.

you aren't allowing yourself time to grow. now you can moan about it, and possibly stunt it, or you can look forward to it, and foster it.
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Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:15 pm   Reply with quote

I just ignore them and act as weird as I want and all. I don't give a *crag* about thier opinions due to the 3 years of lonliness, so it is easy.

And the problem is I doubt there is anything to look foward TO.
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Poison
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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:23 pm   Reply with quote

Theres plenty to look forward to in life, and if there isnt for you. you have to make something to look forward to.
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Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
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Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:24 pm   Reply with quote

Like what? =/
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Poison
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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:30 pm   Reply with quote

that is for the individual to find for themself.
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Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:32 pm   Reply with quote

I guess...

I also hate being alone so much. I wish I had someone that would listen to me and talk to me, honestly.

I don't want a girl for sex or anything... I want it for love. To be with her and all... Probably from my lonlieness...
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Dark Prognosticus` Deed Shop    
Poison
Super Postman
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Jailed


Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Posts: 6363

HP: 100 MP: 10 Lives: 11



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:37 pm   Reply with quote

Dark Prognosticus wrote:
I guess...

I also hate being alone so much. I wish I had someone that would listen to me and talk to me, honestly.

I don't want a girl for sex or anything... I want it for love. To be with her and all... Probably from my lonlieness...


ah Trust me I can relate, I'm sick of this glorification of sex in this day and age. (if anything its a plus to the relationship) and remember if you need someone to talk to I'm more than able to hear anyone out.
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Poison's Boutique    
Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:41 pm   Reply with quote

O Chunks wrote:
Dark Prognosticus wrote:
I guess...

I also hate being alone so much. I wish I had someone that would listen to me and talk to me, honestly.

I don't want a girl for sex or anything... I want it for love. To be with her and all... Probably from my lonlieness...


ah Trust me I can relate, I'm sick of this glorification of sex in this day and age. (if anything its a plus to the relationship) and remember if you need someone to talk to I'm more than able to hear anyone out.

Exactly. Sex is only if you love the person, but it doens't make up the love OR the relasonship.

And I don't like starting conversations. D=
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Dark Prognosticus` Deed Shop    
Poison
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Jailed


Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Posts: 6363

HP: 100 MP: 10 Lives: 11



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:42 pm   Reply with quote

Dark Prognosticus wrote:
O Chunks wrote:
Dark Prognosticus wrote:
I guess...

I also hate being alone so much. I wish I had someone that would listen to me and talk to me, honestly.

I don't want a girl for sex or anything... I want it for love. To be with her and all... Probably from my lonlieness...


ah Trust me I can relate, I'm sick of this glorification of sex in this day and age. (if anything its a plus to the relationship) and remember if you need someone to talk to I'm more than able to hear anyone out.

Exactly. Sex is only if you love the person, but it doens't make up the love OR the relasonship.

And I don't like starting conversations. D=


Theres something that you can change. you can talk to people more, people who will listen. =D
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Poison's Boutique    
Nimexa, The Gentle Breeze
Dark Prognosticus
Burning Werewolf


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 16966

HP: 97 MP: 10 Lives: 1



PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 6:44 pm   Reply with quote

O Chunks wrote:
Dark Prognosticus wrote:
O Chunks wrote:
Dark Prognosticus wrote:
I guess...

I also hate being alone so much. I wish I had someone that would listen to me and talk to me, honestly.

I don't want a girl for sex or anything... I want it for love. To be with her and all... Probably from my lonlieness...


ah Trust me I can relate, I'm sick of this glorification of sex in this day and age. (if anything its a plus to the relationship) and remember if you need someone to talk to I'm more than able to hear anyone out.

Exactly. Sex is only if you love the person, but it doens't make up the love OR the relasonship.

And I don't like starting conversations. D=


Theres something that you can change. you can talk to people more, people who will listen. =D

I'll try...
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