digibutter.nerr

[The Chaos Heart]

*the titals have links to songs you should listen to while reading.*



Prolouge




Narrator: Our story begins with two boys who are, at the present time, sneaking into the Nintendo Warehouse and,

Boy 1: Shut Up! You want us to get caught!

Narrator: I'm just doing my job.

Boy: well you're gonna get us caught! So shut it!

Narrator: *sniffle*

Boy 1: Better.

Boy 2: Hey! What's this?

Narrator: The two young boys stared at a large door.

Boy 2: It reads, "Unedited room. DO NOT OPEN!! UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH!! OPEN AND SUFFER!! YOU'R LIMBS WILL BE TORN!! AND, WE'LL... we'll... POKE YOU!! OOOOOOOOOOOAAAAHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! AND, AND, ANDah skrew it, just open the door."

Boy 1: Sounds perfectly safe and unthreatening.

Narrator: The two enter the room, unaware of the danger within. suddenly, they spot something.

Boy 1: Look!

*picks up a book labled, "Super Paper Mario, the Unedited Version."*

Voice: Nnnnoooooooo! That book contains things not ment to be seen by mortal eyes!

Boy 2: Where are you?

Voice: I am everywhere, and nowhere at the same time.

Boy 2: But how can you...

Voice: DO NOT ARGUE WITH MY LOGIC!!

Boy 2: All I'm saying is that...

Voice: SILENCE OR YOU SHALL FEEL MY RATH!!

Boy 1: Hey, if you're everywhere, that means you're...

Voice: Don't say it!

Boy 1: You're...

Voice: Don't you dare!

Boy 1: You're...

Voice: Don't!

Boy 1: IN MY BELLY!!

*boy starts to poke his stomach*

Voice: No! Hey! Stop! Would you...! Quit it! ENOUGH!! GO READ THE BOOK AND SUFFER!! SUFFER THE WRATH OF PIE!! AND...!

*boy pokes his stomach*

Voice: No! You have bested me. *dies*

Boy 2: Man! I wanted to suffer pie!

Narrator: The two open the book, and an adventure unfolds...



Chapter 1 part 1


Our story begins at the Mario Bros. house.

Luigi: Hey, bro. Such a nice day isn't it?

Mario CHEESE!!!

Luigi: Uuuhhh, okay... makes you kind of bored, doesn't it?

Mario: PUMPERNICLE!!!

*Mario runs around the house yellinf pumpernicle.*

Luigi: Hey, wai--! slow down the--! I wa--!

Mario: PUMPERNICLEPUMPERNICLEPUMPERNICLEPUMPERNICLEPUMPERNICLE bannana.

*Mario suddenly stops*

Mario like bannans.

Luigi: How about we go visit the princess?

Mario: I WANT BANNANAS!!

Luigi: Mabey the princess wil--

before Luigi can finish, Mario grabs him and runs out the door.

Mario: BANNANAS!

suddenly toad appears, screaming for help.

Toad: O @%$#! THE PRINCESS! SHE'S BEEN #$@% KINDAPPED!

Mario: I will-a savd her...WITH THE POWER OF PASTA! *Guy sensei teeth shine. If you don't know, GO WATCH NARUTO FOOL*

Luigi: This must be the work of B--

Mario: MOUSER!

Luigi: No, B--

Mario: Trouser?

Luigi: N--

Mario: POUSER, FROWNSER, OWSER, COWSER, CLOWNSER...AHHH! CLOWN!! *Mario goes into the featall position.*

Luigi: Ugh. You're hopeless. How do you manage to save the world time and again?

Mario: With the power of-a pasta!

*grabs Luigi's arm*

Luihi: O biscuits...

*Mario runs of, dragging poor luigi on the ground, who's head hits everything along the way*

Luigi: Aaahh! Ro--*smash!* Tre--*smash!* Whal--*smash!* Oooo my head...

Finally the the two heroes reach their destination. The bad guy's castle.




Chapter 1 part 2

Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Alright my minions, it's time to initiate my grand master plan! Hammer Bros.!

Hammer Bros.: Yes, Lord Bowser.

*Two Hammer Bros. bring up to Bowser, a golden remote laying on a purple pillow with gold frills. They sit it at Bowsers feet, give a short bow, and join the rest of the minions a couple steps back.*

Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Now...

Bowser turns and looks at Kammy.

Bowser: Hag! Bring forth...THE PACKAGE!

*The minions cheer*

Kammy: Yes your hugeness.

*Kammy brings to Bowser, a oddly shaped paer bag. Bowser then press a button on the golden remote. The floor opens up, and a Giant Cannon comes up out of the ground, pointing directly up.*

Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHA!!! Now, with this package of doom, I GIVE YOU...

*loads bag into cannon*

Bowser: ...THE END...

*Presses another button on the golden remote*

Bowser: ...OF...

*The cannon fires. Suddenly, little parachutes start falliung down from the sky*

Bowser: THE GREAT, PASTRY FAMINE! FREE EVIL MUFFINS AND PASTRIES FOR ALL!

Minions: YAY! WE LOVE YOU LORD BOWSER! YOU'R THE BEST!

*the minions promptly devour everything, including a suspiciously hairy red one in the back*

Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Now, let us invade mushroom castle, and crush the Mario Bros., ONCE AND FOR A-- YOU! IN THE BACK! TAKE YOUR HAIRYNESS SOMEWHERE ELSE!

*Bowser jumps to the back of the crowd to confront the two "hairy koopas".

Luigi: Mario! Look at your self! You've grown fat and overweight from eating so many pas-- AAHHH! BOWSER!

Mario: It's-a King Koopa! MUST SQUISHED THE FAT TURTLE!!

*Mario tries to jump on Bowser, but ironically, trips over his own fat.*

Bowser: GWAHAHAHAHA!!! Poor Mario! To fat to fight! I think my minions deserve to a Mario steak after eating so many pasties... BURNT TO A CRISP!

Mario: No! Mario want to a-be princess!

Bowser: What?

Mario: I WANNA BE A PRETTY PRETTY PINK PRINCESS FAIRY BALLERINA!

Bowser: Uuuuhhh... oookay then.... you have to deal with this every day, don't you?

Luigi: E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y. I could just shoot myself.

Bowser: I feel sorry for you. How's life been treatin ya Luigi? Haven't heard from you and Daisy in a while.

Luigi: I'd rather not talk about it...

Bowser: It's okay. Express you'r feelings. Does someone need a hug?

Luigi: I'd been very greatfull.

*Bowser gives Luigi a BIG hug and...*

Bowser: HEY! A LITTLE PRIVACY! I'M COMFORTING A FRINED HEAR!

Narrator: Sorry.

Luigi: She left me for some Snifit prince.

Bowser: Oh, it's okay. She wasn't good enough for you anyway!

*Bowser gives Luigi another hug*

???: BLEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH BLECK!! You'r princess has been taken, BY COUNT BLE--!

Bowser: Hey!

???: Woops, to early.

*the mysterious figure dissapears*

Luigi: Thanks. Now, Where's the princess!

Bowser: What?! What princess?! We're just now about to launch our atta--!

*suddenly a bright lite flashes, and a cloaked figure appears*



Chapter 1 part 3


???: BLEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH BLECK!! You'r princess has been taken, BY COUNT BLECK!

Mario: It's-a the princess! Hiya princess! Do you have any bannanas?

Bowser: HAY! ONLY I'M ALOUD TO TAKE THE PRINCESS! WHAT RIGHT DO YOU HAVE? YOU HAVE TO... fill out these forms please.

*Bowser hands Bleck a stack of papers.*

Bowser: Fill these out, and then come back.

Count Bleck: Alright, said Count Bleck.

*the count disapears*

Bowser: Sooooo...sould we break out D & D?

Luigi: Okay, sure fine.

Waluigi: Wah! Dragons scare me!

Luigi: Well ther's dungeons t--hey! You're not even in this story!

Waluigi: Wah! I'm scared of not being in the stroy!

Luigi: Ugh...

*some time later...*

Luigi: Yes! 20! My wizard of dragon kills you'r warrior of cedigar!

Bowser: Nnnnnnooooooo! I lllooossstt! My life holds no meaning anymore.

*Count Bleck appears*

Count Bleck: BLEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH BLECK! Count Bleck has finished the forms as required, prclaimed Count Bleck!

Bowser: Ecellent!

*Bowser grabs the papers, and eats them. Luigi and Bleck just stare at him.*

Bowser: *Munch Munch*... What?

Luigi: Nevermind. *looks at Bleck* Shall we continue?

Count Bleck: Please.

Luigi: ...ehem. Bowser? Hey Boooowwwser? Wake up Bowser... BOWSER!!!

*Bowser is sleeping, sucking his thumb, cuddling with a teddy bear*

Luigi: BoWsER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bowser: Huh?! Wah?! O ya! Uuuhhh... *looks at notecard, pausing inbetween words. He is a slow reader* " Give. Back. The princess. You. Uuuhhh...fiend."

Count Bleck: Never! In fact, Count Bleck will take you to, O evil King of Koopas!

*Suddenlt, a dimensional hole opens, and everyone, except Mario because he's to fat, is sucked in*

Mario: Aaaahhhh...

Count Bleck: BLEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH BLECK!!!

*Count Bleck dissapears*

Mario: Mario want-a ride on the spin-spin too...*sniff*

*suddenly, a colorful butterfly appears*

???: Hello, Mario? My name is Tippi. I'm what is known as a pixil, a sort of fairy. I've come t--

Mario: FLYING CHOCOLATE CAKE!! It's a dream come true!

*Mario eats Tippi*

Tippi: Hey! Let me out!

Mario: It speaks! My tummy speaks! Oh mistical tummy, what should I do to go on the spin-spin ride?

Tippi: Ugh, this is hopeless.

*Tippi, within mario's stomach, warps them out of Bowser's Castle, and into the mistical dimension of...flipy-flop side!

[Kirby]

That was freakin' HILARIOUS!

[The Chaos Heart]

Thank you! my life is made to entertain afterall.

[Almaz]

Lemmy's Land Author, right?

After references to cheese, Toad cursing, and Waluigi being a coward, I just KNOW it! Which one?

Pretty darn good. If you're the tourist I think you are, or are trying to immitate, I'll give my full rating. If not, awesome.

[Tails Doll]

This isn't Lemmy's Land. Spare us the crappyness that is Lemmy's Land, please!

[Almaz]

Depends on the author and the taste.

[The Chaos Heart]

[Almaz]

Then I owe you an appology, sir. I've obviously spent as much time there as Bowser spends in his room with Princess Peach photos. Waluigi's fear was what truely made me suspicious, then I added Toad cursing, Mario saying "Cheese" as his first line, a Bobobo-ish narrator, an extremely intellegent Luigi, Mario fat jokes, and Bowser breaking the fourth wall.

But, this is quite excellent. Please, show me more! This audience member is captivated with the magical incantations of your text.

[Zelnor]

MORE ! FEED ME ! Well, it's very good. Some typos, but heck,. digibutter doesn't have auto-correction... *advertise: TIPTRON MK-II : Tips, Makes Stuff visible, integrated dimension warping (Flipside One-Way) and now it even checks your süpelling ! BUY NOW !*

[Super Koopa]

Awsome dude

[Guest]

We must have more! This storie is just too funny!

[Tails Doll]

[Gear]

You could have just said, "No necro posting" without the "newb "

[Guest]

[Gear]

When you post in a reallly old topic.