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Larry Koopa Sam
Joined: 30 Apr 2007 Posts: 16957
HP: 35 MP: 1 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:18 pm
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Now that I've got your attention, I would like you to listen to this rant.
All the people at Square Enix don't know common sense. It's sad. Stupid, strange, wierd, and sad. I mean they get to connected with their game, they don't even think about their characters bios or anything. It's like they didn't even try..Everything in size is completely wrong in the world of Final Fantasy.
Things grow, and shrink.
Cloud Strife, is 21 years old. He has passed puberty. He is 5 "7. He's a midget. Cloud hasn't grown at all since he was 16. He is very fit, though. I mean he used to work for ShinRa. Is he like prone to growth or what? Tifa, is 5 '4, and Aerith is 5 '3. Get a tape measure, and see how small that is. Here's where it gets wierd. Denzel from Advent Children is a kid. Probably about 10 years old. The average height of a 10 year old is somewhere between 4 "6-8. He is slightly taller then Marlene, (as you can see at the end of Advent Children). Marlene is about half of Cloud's height. So she is probably 3 '6. In one of the scenes, Where Barret first comes in, Denzel is standing next to him and reaches to Barrets CHEST. That's not even possible, if so, Denzel would be like 5 "8, but hes not, because Tifa is 5 "4, and he is shorter then Tifa. Impossible. Sephiroth seems taller then everyone, but no, Barret is still taller by 4 inches. Okay, another problem. The Buster sword keeps changing sizes. Zack is 5 "11, and Angeal is taller, so its safe to say hes about 6 "1 (sephiroths size). The buster sword reaches down to the top of his boot when he has it on his back. Same thing with Zack. When Cloud gets it, it really shrunk. It's goes up to the top of his boot too, and he is 5 inches shorter then Angeal.
A freakin' 12 year old can wield the buster sword. Seriously, this game's sizes and ages are all so corrupted. How can they screw up? Cloud's a freakin' midget. He has a small penis, and he changes his size whenever he wants.
The only one who has never changed their size, and is more realistic is Sephiroth. Just think about it guys. Get your measuring tapes and see how small they are IRL. Then again, the average height for a Japanese man is 5 "7. |
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Ohh, THAT makes sense! Tyler Vampire
Joined: 18 Apr 2007 Posts: 11410
HP: 95 MP: 2 Lives: 4
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:19 pm
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I never liked you, Larry Koopa. |
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Yoshi Vampire
Joined: 15 Dec 2007 Posts: 12475
HP: 60 MP: 6 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:26 pm
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1. Square Enix is practically my last hope for good games on Nintendo Consoles these days, and it angers me to a slight degree by saying they suck. 2. I can't make any sense of what you're saying. 3. You're getting angry at crappy details that shouldn't matter. 4. What Tyler said. |
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? Block Fancy Wario
Joined: 18 Apr 2007 Posts: 13463
HP: 69 MP: 8 Lives: 1
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:30 pm
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Yoshi wrote: |
1. Square Enix is practically my last hope for good games on Nintendo Consoles these days, and it angers me to a slight degree by saying they suck. 2. I can't make any sense of what you're saying. 3. You're getting angry at crappy details that shouldn't matter. 4. What Tyler said. |
somebody's not very good at getting jokes |
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lolz Shrowser
Joined: 16 Jul 2007 Posts: 8814
HP: 100 MP: 4 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:37 pm
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If Clout is 5'7 and the average Japanese male height is 5'7, how is he a midget? Unless you're saying the Japanese are midgets... But, that might be kind of racist somehow... |
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darkzero Rusty Shackleford Vampire
Joined: 12 Jun 2007 Posts: 16661
HP: 1 MP: 2 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:50 pm
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I never liked Square enix. :/ °Д° ◉_◉ ʘﮯʘ |
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Ohh, THAT makes sense! Tyler Vampire
Joined: 18 Apr 2007 Posts: 11410
HP: 95 MP: 2 Lives: 4
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:57 pm
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Also, in before Cid. |
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Cid Lord Krump
Joined: 21 Apr 2007 Posts: 7880
HP: 60 MP: 2 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 10:06 pm
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Tyler wrote: | Also, in before Cid. |
I did make a post earlier about how the Japanese have different perceptions about what is tall and short and how there were more important things to complain about, but since this thread seems like a silly joke anyway, I thought it unneeded. |
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and I control the decks carfilledwithfish
Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 3988
HP: 88 MP: 7 Lives: 0
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Posted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 11:38 pm
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I'm 5'7" too. But I'm not a Japanese male. |
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Ohh, THAT makes sense! Tyler Vampire
Joined: 18 Apr 2007 Posts: 11410
HP: 95 MP: 2 Lives: 4
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 12:04 am
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Dr. Eurhok wrote: | I'm 5'7" too. But I'm not a Japanese male. | *POOF*
Now you're a Japanese male! Enjoy your little weiner! :D |
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Fat Tuper lovegod703
Joined: 06 May 2008 Posts: 5515
HP: 10 MP: 6 Lives: 0
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:20 am
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You have really shitty reasons for saying they're dumb and have no common sense, but I agree with you. I totally disagree about all the FF midget stuff, but I agree that a lot of them are stupid. Do you know why? Because they didn't fulfill Sakurai's request to put Geno in Brawl. Why does this make them stupid? 1) It would please a bazillion fans if they let Geno in Brawl. 2) They would get a bazillion dollars. 3) Having one Square Enix character is better than none. 4) Making a bazillion dollars is better than making no dollars.
———————————> |
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TooManyToasters Paper_Waluigi
Joined: 20 May 2007 Posts: 10343
HP: 100 MP: 10 Lives: 1
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:22 am
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ITT: People who don't understand internet sarcasm. ФֻФ |
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Yoshi Vampire
Joined: 15 Dec 2007 Posts: 12475
HP: 60 MP: 6 Lives: 0
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 8:12 am
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There are some people who I don't consider perticularly smart, and if those people make a sarcastic joke on the internet, I'd probably think they're being serious. |
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Parabuzzy Queen Macha
Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 11083
HP: 10 MP: 5 Lives: 0
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 11:23 am
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And while we're on the subject of plotholes... *shot*
Nah, I kind of still like Square Enix. They might have done some things *coughtheafter* with some of their games *coughffiv* that I don't particularly like, but they manage to balance that out with awesome like TWEWY. :3
I kind of lol'd at the height discrepancies, though. |
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Larry Koopa Sam
Joined: 30 Apr 2007 Posts: 16957
HP: 35 MP: 1 Lives: 0
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Posted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 1:15 pm
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Shrowser wrote: | If Clout is 5'7 and the average Japanese male height is 5'7, how is he a midget? Unless you're saying the Japanese are midgets... But, that might be kind of racist somehow... |
Is that anything like a blood clought?
Oh, and sorry to ruin all the fun. But like, all you guys who took this seriously, try studying sarcasm.
But I'm still right about Denzel growing abnormally huge and shrinking again. |
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