digibutter.nerr

[Francis]

In memory of the greatest seller ever of $19.99 as-seen-on-tv items, we are having a new Item Contest!
(check out the first contest we had two years ago)

Pitch your idea for a new item in this topic (please no battle-items, I don't want to be flooded with HP modifiers), or create a new topic in Your Creations. The winning item will become a reality!

The winner will be decided based on:

• Quality of the pitch. Try using images or even video!
  
• Item usefulness.
  
• User voting.
  

May the best pitchman or pitchwoman win!
ACT NOW!

[supermsn]

Hi, super-msn here for promoting a great new product. This one is called the FLAME BANG! The flame bang is a new kind of fire work that still displays your message, but with a new twist! The twist is that instead of a bunch of colorful circles appearing on the screen,YOU decide what appears!If you want a star, type star!If you want , type !The choice is yours!So go ahead to the shop, and tell them Msn sent you!

[Lord Krump]

HEY, CID HIGHWIND HERE PROMOTING AN EXCELLENT NEW PRODUCT CALLED THE "SOUND POUND!"

INSTEAD OF HAVING TO MESS WITH OLD-FASHIONED ESNIPS TAGS, WITH THIS HANDY-DANDY NEW DEVICE, YOU CAN JUST "BURY" THE FILE OF THE SOUND YOU WANT TO PLAY IN THE THREAD EVERY TIME YOU MAKE A NEW ONE!

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL!

JUST LIKE HOW POSTS HAVE SMALL GRAPHICS NOTIFYING USERS THAT THERE ARE BURIED ITEMS WITHIN THE POSTS, THERE WILL BE SMALL BUTTONS AT THE TOP OF THE OPENING POST THAT ALLOW YOU TO MUTE THE MUSIC IF MUSIC IS EMBEDDED!

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL!

YOU CAN DISABLE THE EMBEDDED MUSIC FUNCTION FOR YOURSELF FROM YOUR "EDIT PROFILE" SCREEN (SHOWS ALOT ABOUT YOUR APPRECIATION OF MUSIC, THOUGH!)

I DON'T HAVE ANY PICTURES TO SHOW FOR IT, BUT WHO GIVES A CRAP? IT'S MORE OF AN AUDIO THING THAN A VISUAL THING! SO GO AHEAD AND PROMOTE THE ADDITION OF THE "SOUND POUND," AND REMEMBER: TELL PEOPLE THAT CID HIGHWIND TOLD YOU TO DO IT!

[Goron Mask]

HI GORON MASK HERE WITH NERR-LSD, NERR LSD WILL MAKE YOU TRIP BALLS FOR AS LONG AS YOU LIKE, SHIT THIS STUFF IS SO CRAZY IT MAKES YOU GO TO THE WRONG FORUM EVERY *crag* TIME YOU CLICK ON SOMETHING, YOU WANNA BORING POST? HELL I DON'T WANT A BORING POST ON NERR LSD ALL TEXT REVERTS TO CAPSLOCK SIZE 29 BOLDED RAINBOW GRADIENT POSTING SHIT NIGGAS BE TRIPPING THEMSELVES TO WHEN THEY SEE YOUR POST, *crag* UPON POSTING EVERYONE WHO POSTS AFTER YOU WILL START TRIPPING BALLS THEMSELVES, THIS'LL LAST 3 POSTS INTILL IT WEARS OFF FOR THEM BUT THE INITIAL USER CAN POST HAS A NEVER ENDING TRIP INTILL HE SAYS NO, THATS RIGHT YOU CAN SAY NO AND IT WILL BE GONE SHIT, ALSO SICK OF SEEING TIPPI? SHIT SON ON NERR LSD TIPPI WILL BE BILLY MAYS, HOLY *crag* SHIT SON AND YOU CAN GET ALL OF THIS FOR JUST 1 COIN...THATS RIGHT GENTLEMEN ONE *crag* COIN. VOTE FOR THIS SHIT NOW

[Gold Prognosticus]

Don't you just HATE it when a guy attacks you for no reason? Doesn't it INFURIATE you, paying for life shrooms to bring yourself back to life, only to get killed five minutes later?

Well no more!

I'm Gold Prognosticus, and I'd like to present the Mini Shroom!

Just one bite will shrink you and your avatar down to the size of a flea! Once shrunk, you'll be able to dodge attacks with NO EFFORT AT ALL! To be precise, 50% of all attacks will pass by you like you aren't even there! All this for the measly pice of 10 coins!

But wait! There's more!

If you order now we'll throw in the brand new Disguise Kit free!

With this item, you will have the ability to disguise yourself as anybody else. I'm not kidding you here, anybody means ABSOLUTELY ANYBODY! Watch out though, because you can be spotted!

If a member attacks you, YOUR DISGUISE WILL FLICKER!
If a member posts after you in a topic, YOUR DISGUISE WILL FLICKER!
If you die, YOUR DISGUISE WILL FALL APART!
And of course, watch out for the guy you disguised as, since HE WILL ALWAYS KNOW YOU'RE AN IMPOSTER!

But apart from that, you can wander around in public with nobody recognising you!

But you need to hurry - this offer ends July 13th! After that the Disguise Kit will cost 15 coins! So, to get the Mini Shroom and Disguise Kit for the ridiculous price of only 10 coins, just call 555-NERR now!

Act now! I personally assure you that you will not regret it!

[Emil]

So this can be a video? Hmm... This will take a few days.

[kEvin]

HEY, VDOGAM3R HERE, SELLING ELBEA TAHG!

THAT'S RIGHT, ELBEA TAHG


*gasps for air*

[Gold Prognosticus]

*looks at previous results*
It seems someone already won with a mini shroom. Meh, I'm gonna stick with my entry, perhaps it might convince Francis to make it eventually. *points at 'I'm gonna make all these items* statement in the last contest*

[around the yoshi stone]

buy Dedede's shield shroom

[Francis]

Please keep the posts here to submissions, or discussion about the contest in general. If you like a certain item, cookie it.

[Super Ultimario]

HEY! ULTI MAYS HERE, WITH AN AMAZING NEW PRODUCT!

ARE YOU TIRED OF BEING ATTACKED?!

ARE YOU CONSTANTLY GETTING BITTEN BY VAMPIRES FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON?!

DO YOU HATE HAVING YOUR INBOX OVERFLOWING WITH PEOPLE TAKING DOWN YOUR HARD-EARNED EXTRA LIVES JUST SO THEY CAN SHOW OFF, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE OFFLINE?!

WELL, WORRY NO MORE!

BECAUSE FOR JUST TWO EASY PAYMENTS OF $24.99 (COINS), YOU CAN GET A BOO MUSHROOM!



WHAT DOES IT DO?! WHY, IT'S SIMPLE!

YOU USE IT ON YOURSELF, AND BAM! YOU'RE COMPLETELY INVINCIBLE TO ALL THOSE JERKS AND GERMS WHO ATTACK AND CONTAMINATE YOUR PRECIOUS AVATAR, YOUR PRIDE, AND TO AN EXTENT YOUR INBOX!

YOU ALSO GET A NICE-LOOKING "BOO" AT THE END OF YOUR TITLE BELOW YOUR NAME! PERFECT FOR HALLOWEEN PARTIES, LOOKS SHARP, AND IMPOSSIBLE TO GET RID OF UNLIKE THOSE LAME VAMPIRES! AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GETTING KILLED INSTANTLY AT THE COST OF 24 COINS LIKE THOSE UNDERPOWERED WEREWOLVES, EITHER!

IF SOME GUY TRIES TO BITE YOU OR ATTACK YOU WHILE THIS ITEM'S WORKING, HE GETS A MESSAGE SAYING "THIS GUY'S A GHOST! YOU CAN'T HURT HIM!", MAYBE WITH SOME "CAN'T TOUCH THIS" PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND FOR ADDED SHAME! THEY EVEN LOSE THE ITEM THEY WERE TRYING TO USE ON YOU AS PUNISHMENT FOR THEIR CRUELTY, AND THEIR STUPIDITY IN NOT NOTICING YOUR EXTREMELY HANDSOME BOO TITLE! YES, THIS MEANS VAMPIRES COMPLETELY LOSE THEIR FANGS AND END UP AS NORMAL PEOPLE WHEN THEY TRY TO BITE YOU! SERVES 'EM RIGHT!

BUT YOU MAY BE WONDERING, CAN'T THIS BE ABUSED?! CAN'T SOMEBODY HARASS AND ATTACK EVERYONE ELSE WHILE INVINCIBLE, OR ATTACK SOMEBODY AND THEN TURN INVINCIBLE TO AVOID THE COMPLETELY JUSTIFIED REVENGE?

NO WORRIES! BOO MUSHROOM ONLY WORKS IF YOU HAVEN'T ATTACKED OR HEALED ANYONE FOR THE LAST 48 HOURS, AND WHILE YOU'RE INVINCIBLE YOU CAN'T ATTACK ANYONE! YOU ALSO CAN'T HEAL ANYONE WHILE INVINCIBLE, BUT WHO CARES ABOUT HAVING ONLY ONE HP WHEN YOU CAN'T EVER LOSE IT?!

IF YOU EVENTUALLY FEEL LIKE KILLING PEOPLE AND WANT TO GET OUT OF THIS, THEN NO PROBLEM! YOU CAN JUST BUY A MONSTER CURE AT THE SHOPS FOR TEN COINS OR LESS!

ORDER NOW AT 666-BOO-SHRM!

THAT'S 666-BOO-SHRM!

CALL RIGHT AWAY AND YOU GET TO BE THE FIRST ON YOUR BLOCK IN THE WORLD TO BE COMPLETELY INVINCIBLE! YOU COULD CATCH THOSE IDIOTS WHO DON'T WATCH MY COMMERCIALS BY COMPLETE SURPRISE WHEN THEIR ITEMS HAVE NO EFFECT ON YOU, AND THEY END UP LOSING THEM!

JUST CALL 666-BOO-SHRM!

BECAUSE I CLEARLY HAVEN'T SAID 666-BOO-SHRM ENOUGH ALREADY! WE DON'T WANT YOU TO FORGET THE PHONE NUMBER 666-BOO-SHRM, NOW DO WE?! BECAUSE YOU DESERVE THAT BOO MUSHROOM!

NOW TIME FOR THE STEREOTYPICAL SUPER-FAST AND NEARLY INAUDIBLE DISCLAIMERS AT THE END!



We are not responsible to any idiotic injuries or losses resulting from this item, such as accidentally poking your eye out or tripping over it or something. I mean seriously, this thing's about as soft as a marshmallow, if you can get hurt by this it's your fault that you're such an idiot. Boo Mushroom is probably copyright Nintendo or something. Credit to YagamiMirror for the small item image. Offer void in Nebraska.

[MarioMario]

Hi! Mario Mario here!

Scared of ghosts? Goombas? Any types of nasty monsters?

Well I'm here to help.

With my new and patented BILLY MAY'S MEGAPHONE.

This megaphone amplifies voices so hard, others would think you're yelling at them yet feel urges to listen to what you have to say, and those monsters that move in a linear pattern will have their pants scared off-a them!

Need to use it on a message board? Sure! The world (or at least the entire forum) will know of your post! If there's a messaging system, they'd IMMEDIATELY be notified of your PWNTASTIC post!

Think this offer isn't for you (yet)? We'll I'm prepared to offer a bonus to this magnificent device! If this idea is accepted, I will give you 5 free bottles of FORUM-OXYCLEAN-HYPER-COMBO-FINISH-CANCEL (with a touch of) AWESOMENESS! The power of clean has never been so portable as this agent will clean all the colors and grime offa' your username.

If even THAT doesn't please you, I have ONE MORE OFFER!!!

Accept these two now, and I'll throw in a free 2-liter bottle of FALCON PUNCH! The fruit punch-energy drink with a 1337% D.V. balanced mixture of B-vitamins, C-vitamins, and ALL THE VITAMINS YOU CAN HANDLE! Powerthirst? Doesn't do the job. Why pay $200 for you and your family for something that doesn't work? I'll tell you, there's no reason as to why! This is the way to go when you feel tired.

Oh wait! THERE'S MORE.

Call now (after this has been accepted) and you get the BILLY MAYS MESSAGE BOARD COLLECTION!

Mighty Putty: Don't want anyone rating your post badly? SECURE IT WITH MIGHTY PUTTY!
Impact Gel: People picking on you with HP-reducing items? SURVIVE IT (and a 10000000-ton force possibly) with IMPACT GEL.

AND THERE'S ONE LAST THING.

With all these items come the most glorious item of all. The Billy Mays relationship badge.

[(username) is pitching a product with/to (username)]

Now you can pitch your ideas FOREVER!

Call NOW!

[Emil]

Alright, I'm making my video today, but I'll go ahead and do the pitch right now.

Hi Billy Mays here with The Invincishroom! Do want a little pep in your step? Do you want to be *crag* invincible? Now you can! Made with a secret blend of 1up Mushrooms and Stars, this amazing Mushroom will make you completely invincible for 48 hours! That's right! 48 hours!

The only downside? When using this Item, you have a 50% chance of getting the "Bean Fever" Status! What the hell does this status do? Well, I'll tell you! When you have Bean Fever, you take TRIPLE DAMAGE! That's right, TRIPLE DAMAGE! Not only that, but your Avatar has a greenish Hue, and for every post you make, the letters get scrambled up! (But it can be turned off, of course.)

So what the *crag* are you waiting for? Let luck decide your life! Go buy one right now!

[Francis]

Seeing a lot of battle-related items.
I would like to see more forum-related items, that can be used on posts, or on user profiles, or the site in general

[Super BLU Spy]

Yes, does anyone even USE the battle system all that much?