If you figured Saints Row: The Third's pre-order bonus was going to be a real life "sex toy bat," don't feel bad ... so did we. Turns out the actual pre-order bonus is far more tame, but a whole lot more crazy. The Professor Genki's Super Ethical Reality Climax "Hyper Ordinary Pre-Order Pack" includes in-game items like Prof Genki's Super Ballistic Man-a-pult truck, Prof. Genki's "Octopuss" cannon that fires baby octopi and Prof. Genki's Leisure Stunt Suit with Genki mask. Admit it, you still want the giant, purple rubber phallus.

The first 3,000 folks in North America who purchase the game through the THQ Online Store will receive the "Saints Row Season Pass" for free. The pass, "valued at more than $20," will grant access to three downloadable mission packs. The season pass is likely similar to those by Warner Bros. for Mortal Kombat and by Rockstar for LA Noire.