We're gonna let the "Ouch, my wallet!" jokes simmer for a couple days (or until we can think of a good one, whichever comes first) and instead we'll just give you all the straight poop on today's Steam Summer Sale offerings.

Amongst today's Most Discounted Things[TM] is the Carpe Fulgur series, which includes Chantelise - A Tale of Two Sisters, Fortune Summoners and Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale. Today's offering also boasts a heavily discounted Total War mega pack, Sins of a Solar Empire: Rebellion and Super Meat Boy. In addition, there's a new Indie Bundle that features Q.U.B.E. and Dungeons of Dredmor, among other titles.

Oh! Here's one: What's the difference between a second mortgage and the Steam Summer Sale? With a second mortgage, at least you get to keep the house!

... No? Okay, maybe next time.