TV is evil. No, no, not because it drains our brains, turns all children into devil-worshiping miscreants, and won’t let Gordon Ramsay host everything, but because it taught me to expect that the very TV-like Walking Dead season two would arrive only a year after its pioneering predecessor. But alas, tearing out the reigning Emotion King’s decaying guts and replacing them with state-of-the-art new ones takes time. So then, when do you think Walking Dead season two is kicking off? 30 years from now? Tomorrow? Half-Life? Nope. Try late next year. Besides, everyone knows Half-Life 3′s been out for years. Valve’s just doing a timed exclusive with the actual Combine dimension to ensure this one’s safety. I mean, obviously.

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