Sega is giving the people what they want. Sonic's lips are sewn together tightly, his pals have been laid to rest in a shoebox somewhere in the garden, and the world is nice and two-dimensional again. This is the 16-bit sequel you've been craving for sixteen bitter years, one that sidesteps every pitfall introduced in Sonic's 3D outings. Finally, the cycle is over!
But there's a problem. If you've been on the verge of starvation for 16 years, you might be a tad too eager to swallow any crumb that's flicked your way. And if there's one thing that Sonic the Hedgehog 4 is, it's crummy.
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Isn't that what a Sonic game is supposed to be all about?