We now bring you this transmission, directly from alternate universe evil (or are they the good ones?) Bizarro RPS:

John: Goodness, what a boring day it’s been. Probably the least exciting in recorded history.

Jim: Here’s an idle musing for you: joy is dead. And so is God.

Adam: Wouldn’t it be amazing if a spiritual successor to Total Annihilation just made $2 million, a thinly veiled follow-up to Planescape: Torment was just announced, and an agonizingly long-awaited Half-Life remake finally launched – all in the same day?

John: Well, I mean, Ubisoft just announced its new always online double-DRM. If you disconnect from the Internet, it kills you. That’s something, right? Something that kills you, I mean.

Alec: [Says nothing. Still on vacation. Evil vacation.]

Me, under the iron grip of the Neo-British Colonial Extermination Empire: Can I… ? Can I eat now? It’s been days.

All: No.

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