Few topics rankle the feathers of the video game enthusiast these days quite like that of pre-order bonus content. Whether it's lamenting the excising of content from a game for the sake of releasing it later as a bonus (or paid DLC), offering unlocks for content that's already on the disc, or tossing so many confusing, bizarre options out there that invariably, everyone is going to end up disappointed, there isn't an awful lot to like about pre-ordering games these days.

One of the more extreme examples of pre-ordering insanity comes from WB Games and developer Rocksteady's upcoming Batman sequel, Arkham City. We've heard over the last few weeks about a variety of different pre-order options coming our way, including everything from various Batman character skins, to Joker-oriented multiplayer maps and even the boy wonder himself. Robin, as a playable character. But between all these different pieces of content, as well as the various retailer exclusivity deals attached to them, figuring out where, how, and why to pre-order has apparently been something of a headache for would-be players.

We know this, because a moderator on the official Arkham City forums actually went to the trouble of creating a pre-ordering guide for anyone trying to figure out where to get the content they want. Yes, that's right: a guide to pre-ordering a game. I'm not completely certain if this is the last sign of the apocalypse before the Horsemen come down and start inflicting plague, pestilence and pre-order bonuses on the screaming, writhing masses, but it certainly looks like it.

The list is especially confusing because different regions have different retailers, and thus the exclusivity deals change depending on which portion of the planet you dwell within. Take a look at this list, and do your best not to go boss-eyed.

ROBIN

• GERMANY -AMAZON
• FRANCE- MICROMANIA
• HOLLAND - GAMEMANIA
• BELGUIM - GAMEMANIA AND SMARTOYS
• ITALY - GAMESTOP
• NORDICS- GAMESTOP
• NORTH AMERICA - BESTBUY
• CANADA - BEST BUY
• AUSTRALIA - JB HIFI
• MEXICO - GAMERUSH

BATMAN 1970S SKIN

• UK- SHOPTONET
• FRANCE- AMAZON
• ITALY- FNAC
• AUSTRALIA - EB GAMES

JOKER DLC MAP (CARNIVAL)

• GERMANY - MEDIA MARKT
• FRANCE - GAME
• HOLLAND AND BELGIUM - FREE RECORD SHOP
• ITALY - MEDIA MARKET
• US - GAMESTOP
• AUSTRALIA - EB GAMES
• CANADA- GAMESTOP

ANIMATED SERIES SKIN

• GERMANY - SATURN
• FRANCE- CASINO
• HOLLAND- BART SMIT
• BELGIUM - FNAC
• ITALY- FELTRINELLI
• AUSTRALIA - JB HIFI

BATMAN BEYOND SKIN

• UK - GAMESTOP
• GERMANY - MULLER GE PLAYART AUSTRIA
• FRANCE- AUCHAN
• HOLLAND- MICROMEDIA
• BELIGUM - HORELEC
• ITALY- OPENGAMES
• AUSTRALIA - GAME
• MEXICO - GAMERS RETAIL

BATMAN YEAR ONE SKIN

• GERMANY - EXPERT
• FRANCE - FNAC
• BELGIUM - DREAMLAND COLRUYT
• ITALY- BLOCKBUSTER

BATMAN EARTH ONE SKIN

• GERMANY- GAMESTOP
• FRANCE- JEUX VIDEO & CO
• HOLLAND- GAMEWORLD
• BELGIUM- BEMS
• ITALY - CIDIVERTE
• AUSTRALIA - JB HIFI

US

• AMAZON - $10 Amazon credit and Arkham City Comic (print version of the 5 digital comics)
• WALMART- $ 10 egift card

Congratulations. If you managed to get through all of that and make it to the other side unscathed, you get your baby brother back and David Bowie will sing you a nice ballad.

The worst part of all of this? It isn't even the complete list. Several territories and retailers aren't even finalized yet, meaning that more layers of obfuscation will be added to the process before we even get within punching distance of playing this game. We've reached out to WB Games for any info as to whether these pieces of content will become paid DLC in the foreseeable future or not, but as of yet have not received a response. I'll update this story if they get back to us.

(Thanks to whatisdelicious for sending this in!)